Happy notes needed.

=(

I'm not very happy at the moment. Need some source of happiness to defeat the depress feeling.

Just sometime I'm trying my real best to do my stuff but it progressing damn slow. I know, but I can't make money grow. =( I'm sad...I'm really doing things I should do, I know...but....who cares anyway.

I brought all this myself. I know I'm the one to blame, no one else except me....I will definitely deal with it. I know that too...

I need more time, I wanna cry but I can't and it's killing me.

Just to sad to think about anything...never mind just focus on my studies.

X(

Sunday eh?

Adios amigo~

Pretty slow Sunday today eh? Haha don't really wanna do anything much today. Eat, surf net, look out of stuff, help out my parent to reset their phones, this that and so on....hmm pretty much nothing special.

Man, but I'm kind of tired with whatever I'm now dealing with. Like my work, studys and saving. Damn, I really wanna make a huge difference in my life now but I can't rush right? To think about it, actually is really nothing and all I have to do is to work harder. Of course, it feel tough but won't it be better for me to deal with it now or rather suffer later? I don't wanna drag any further as I just wanna be more independent than usual, to rely on no one except me.

Well, is not like world end or something. I'm actually happy with whatever things I have now and what I'm doing. Jiayou beh, Ruixian~ and just freaking look forward for the December's Korea Trip! WOOHOO!!!

Oh ya! And HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to my scary worst loan shark aka MUM!!!! heehee just kidding, she's a nice woman.

Like bored only...

Yup. That's right, like bored only.

LOL, alright anyway back here again to blog. Well not sure why am I back here to blog, but at least trying to type out my shit here for my future me to look back what kind and tons of stupid shit glorious shit I had done. Sound ridiculous right? Haha kinda hard to say why I'm doing this but maybe just purely wanna pen down what had I been doing or done in my past.

There had been times that I had fallen and broken up in to pieces, even though it's tough but somehow I still manage to get myself up with the people who cares and words of enlightenment to save me and remind me who I really am and what I should really do. I know sometime things happened for a reason, but what's make me dishearten the most is whereby you can't get to know the reason why, no matter how to try to find it. 

Haha, even though things had been happened for quite long time already but the feeling is there, at least not as bad as how it was. It just feels like an reminder or maybe like what many people said "one part of an experience in life". Heavy eh? Well just not allowing any negative shit get into my life.

Anyway thanks to you, I get to know my weakness, my needs and my goals in life. I know I'm not that strong enough but I will get better. I will love myself more before I start loving my future another half. But whatever I had done to you in the past, I will gladly take it as my lesson. Thank you what you had given, it will be buried deeply within me, eternally.  

I still growing and always learning. Cheers to my future and bring it on!

Long time no blog.

LOL hello to my dear freaking dead bog.

Haha, been damn while for me to blog again. So funny and weird that i decided to blog a little on my dead blog. Who cares anyway right coz there's definitely no one was even reading my blog or do not know it existence. LOL.

Oh well, let's talk about my recent life...

Everything is fine. Got into a good job with nice people and interesting environment. I really never thought i would get into a admin job inside a laboratory which was quite a surprising case for me. As for now, so far so good although i still get into some shit once in awhile which can be avoided thou lol. As for my current relationship with SIDD, everything is fine too but i'm getting a little impatient with him, is like whenever either of us spark the light to get us into a fight and i will get super angry with him to whatever things he said to me. Like not even a chance given to him at all...argh just plain angry, you know. Maybe i know him too much that's why when he start to give those crap, i will like just explode. Oh well, but seriously i wish can treat him sweeter and nicer than being an angry girl, even my poor idiot bf also hope i will be nice to him like how i treated him in the being of the relationship. But sometime i just think that  in order to get what you want, you have to give too. Am i right? Anyway, no matter how bad i treat my bf, in the end i still love him. Silly meow meow.

Alright then, i gonna sleep now. Tomorrow gonna have some Dota 2 session with sidd and his youngster bro at his house and jogging date too. Oh and i need to buy Yellow Sub to his house too coz his mum is craving for their nice beef burger *SLURP*.

LOL, ok then OYASUMI~

Boring Sunday...

Hi, i extremely sad today. Maybe lonely...

Been feeling quite tired and sleepy for this week, i was looking forward my weekends as i wanna buy something for my upcoming anniversary with love and wanna spend time going out with him today...but things didn't go how i expected. Yeah, expecting for things again...

Got pissed, upset, disappointed and whatsoever words which could describe the feeling when things didn't get in the way i want and hope for. Although getting myself knowing the news from him that he wasn't going to free for today, my heart just sink for no good reason. Can't help to feel that way and i lose myself...maybe i had either his house or mine doing nothing which had made me to look forward to walk around places like having some dates, seeing things and enjoying ourselves on my sunday...but sadly it didn't happened for today. 

I had been feeling a little unstable and getting paranoid for some issues. Maybe i got myself a little stress up for no reason...and i find it too unhealthy for me. And also the causes which is causing me is my dear bf is going for his NS real soon...finally the time is here and desperately trying to get back to my last time when i'm single and happily doing all sort of nonsense all by myself. But i don't know how, and i'm worried. 

I know i'm gonna for him for two years and it's a long wait, but i already wait for so many for him and after knowing him for two years, we finally got together...and to wait for him for another two years, it shouldn't be any problem for me...but i don't know why i feel worried and sad...i want to be happy while waiting. It's not like he gonna go somewhere or what...i must be thinking too much until it's out of my mind =.=.

Ah goddamn it. Screw it...one after an other. Shall find other things to do to distract...games or anime maybe.

I think i had enough typing nonsense here. Need to rest alittle now...chiao-su.

to be continued...

Gone case...

ADIOS~

Hello mina san~ i'm back to make my blog look alive abit, HAHA pathetic much eh. 

Woohoo one more week to go and i'm gonna be free bird from my current job^^ BUT...it'z also mean i gonna be jobless soon T.T. Seriously like my feeling now is so damn rojak, don't know whether should i be happy or to cry =.=. Sad much too, but still not that bad enough to "FML" you know. Althought there was some case which i failed myself on a job interview which i was hoping to get it and was quite excited by it but i screwed it all up by the thingz i said that bloody came out of my mouth...oh well what can i say. Thing had done been done, there'z nothing much i can rewrite about it and the only to stop it for happening again is to get my best shot for my upcoming interview (hopefully they call me up real soon T.T) and try not to make any silly mistakes. 

Ok enough about my stupid matter...woohoo~ my very first trip to Bangkok is coming damn soon already =D. Haha, althought i'm freaking leaving at next thurs but it is still kinda happy to get alittle excited about...Psst! somemore i'm freaking fly on a business class there BUT is by Scoot. LOL~ whatever~ Anyway i just hope i had a great fun and experience there together with my fellow friendz=). And also spend my time well with my SIDD as he is going for his NS enlistment soon at next Oct 30th=/ wish he will be doing fine when he gets in.

Alright then, i shall end my blog post here. Hopefully i will be back with more serious blogging business here=). Chiao-suuu~

HAHA, SIDD will definetely kill me if saw this. You think i care?! XD

to be continued...

Round and Rounder...

Hihi.

*yawnzxzx* Boring as usual.

Up till today, everything were so far so good...working eating drinking talking sleeping. BUT recently there'z a BIG problem on me...

I'M FREAKING GAINNING WEIGHT!!!! 

Damn, this is seriously happening. Sad life when i'm working in office with all sort of food temptation..well, actually that can be prevented, it'z just the person herself who can't resist when it'z about food =.=. So angry with me, now even my mum is making fun of me and my body with all the fat nonsense T.T. My mum is such a bully when it come to fatz, seriously no mercy T.T.

Anyway, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

I told myself and swear that i gonna cut cut cut cut down till my birthday comez. Hopefully i can get to 75 and below...AND I DON'T WANNA GET MOCK BY MY MUM WITH HER EVIL LAUGHER AGAIN....~

Haha, alright then. Gonna sleep now, O-YA-SU-MI.

to be continued...

=3...

Yosh...~

Huuhuu, hihi i'm back again. LOL.

Actually i'm here to rant about my fucked-up job. Sian, firstly of all it'z a very boring job i work before, secondly i hate all the OL aka desperate housewifez, and lastly my new SUPERVISOR. *roll eyez*

About that new lau da of mine, seriously i don't what the hell he is seriously thinking. Yeah, i understand that he want the team to improve BUT somehow he want it happen straight away, is like what the fuck?? Come on, you need a change but not forcing it to happen quick, is like making his and our team'z life worst instead of going or moving on to be better. Lookz like another no action talk only...fook him. 

Seriously i'm really very angry. When i ask for stuff to do, there'z nothing being instructed to me. When i using my phone and trying my very best not to finish up my next day work, he bloody say i too free already and gave me a one big chunk of that he claim is my part of work i have to do. Not only that, he even gave me deadline which is impossible to be done when i have my first piority stuff to do and work on. CCB, don't know is it my work to do or his shit of his. Super angry to the max. Damn him seriously...

I really don't like my job at all...hate it. It was irritating at first but it got bad=(...I really don't like, but how to do?? i still need to endure till end OCT but my malay collegue ask me to stay till one year so i can gain the experience which i could proudly put it onto my resume. I want but i hate my job because of that fellow. I don't how to endure till that one year=(. Maybe i need to think about before i decide anything...

Huuhuu, let'z talk about other thing...

Haiyo, been wanting to go thailand since this year January. All sort of exotic foodz, templez, tuk-tuk and many many more. Haha, make me feel so excited eh...but don't when dumb dumb able to bring me there=/. I wanna eat all the thingz that he said to me, and places in Bangkok to have a great big shopping spree. I wanna see the thingz that he alwayz see at there=) haha and so do he too. Haiz but it would be nice if his parentz have some faith on him=/, Hopefully i'm able to travel with him, jk and kx there soon=). And i hope i can go overseaz with any of my friendz and my family next year again=D.

Thatz all for now. Gonna go play dota with love and his little bro=D. CHIAO-SU~

to be continued...

You jump, i jump...

HELLO EVERYBODY~ to whosoever still coming by to my to read when my blog is super duper dead. LOL

Omg seriously, i didn't know that blogger had change their layout when i login just now...Ok it'z different. Haha anyway it'z not gonna affect to what i wanna blog here. 

Huuhuu, i'm to blog alittle with not-much-picture i took on last sunday, 22nd April, at Marina Bay Sand, ArtScience Museum. Wootz, it'z TITANIC EXIBITION~!!! haha.

 

It'z was very amazing and wonderful visit there. Seriously everything there showed were beautiful and sad. I felt touched when i saw the thingz there when is used to be there 100 yearz ago=).

....

IT"Z GONNA BE MAY REAL SOON!!!

Timez fly quite fast eh...it'z abit fast till i can realise it. Keep it up man, but not too fast coz i scare i screw up my own time and schedule that i had planned to do. Heehee, tawain i'm coming soon to attack all your goodies and yummy-lious street foooooooooodzzzz...~ MUAHAHAHA~

Huuhuu, thatz all for now. Hopefully i will blog real soon again=). Chiao-su~

to be continued...

Late post: 14th Feb'12

Wootz.

Ha, gonna blog a photo post again. Photo all were taken at Botanica Garden on Valentine'z day=). My "rich indonesia chinese" bf and me, LOL. XD





Meowzxzx.

to be continued...

Fast one=)...

Huuhuu~

I'm gonna do a quick photo post. It'z all taken at east coast park, 8 Feb.


Meow meow love~ =3

to be continued...

happy but stress...

YOOOOOOOOSSSSSHHHH!!!

Ha, this is my first post for this year eh. Hahaha who ask me don't blog so often, so what anyway~

Yippee ya ya yippee ya~ I just got my bonuez pipping hot transfered into my bank=D. Happy though, somehow i don't know how to use the right word to describe the mix-ed up feeling i have. I feel stress...just feel stress.

I don't know what and which step to go, i already made up my mind with something but i don't just don't wish to destroy otherz. I know sometime i have to sacrifice something to in order to do or get something but in that progess will definitely affect otherz, which i don't really like. Coz i understand there is thingz which are going on and it'z quite tough, so that'z why it had affected my decision and i feel lost. Seriously i wanted to bring up the matter to him but seeing thingz going on at around him, make me freaking bad and feel like shit if i leave. I really don't know what to do=(. I really cherish them, and don't feel like leaving but i can't stay there forever=( i need upgrade myself too=(...who can really tell what to do?? unhappy me=(.

Oh well, i shall shift my focus to other thing awhile.

SUNDAY AR~!!! Come to mememememememememememememe NOOOOOW~!!! Sweet smell-ing off day=D. I love you so much, so to me soon can??=) LOL.

Haha, kinda excited eh. Coz got planz to do on that day with my love=). Hopefully all the thingz can be done on that day=). Weeee~ off off off off off off off off off off off~ X)

Alright then, shall stop here. Gonna sms dumb dumb see whether he'z done playing dota with his little brother=).

CHIAO-SUUU~

----------------------------------------------------------------------

New addict=). Introduced by my love=). Stupid dumb dumb trying to sing like her recently, LOL.

to be continued...

Last post for 2011...

HUU!!!

I'm here to blog loh~

Shoot...feel like blogging but don't what to blog about=.=. Oh well shall talk random stuff about what had happened last few=).

Let me start talking about my work...OKAY!!! IT'Z FREAKIING BUSY EVER SINCE THE START OF THIS DECEMBER!!! God, is like everyday 5++K =.=. I think my fatty boss should be happily counting this pipping hot money on his hand, like MUAHAHAHA~ MUUUUUNEEEHHHHHH~. Haha, although is busy, i still had fun working in my this stinky bbq part time job=).

Hmm, what'z next neh...ok about family and friendz then.

Huu~ My granny, who'z currently still staying in my house, still giving headache like almost everyday. What can we do, just have to endure to her shitty illness. There'z no one blame on coz it'z all up to her whether she wanna let go the matter and relax herself. Past matter really killz=.=.

Recently had just some stuff which had stuck in my brain for quite very long time. I know there'z some thing i should take initiative to do like but it happen in some which make don't feel like doing it coz there'z problem that i had which make doesn't feel like doing it, in order to avoid the person which i don't feel like going out with. It'z not like saying i doesn't regard her as a friend or what, but somehow i just to erase those ugly part which had remain in my memory about her coz it cause quite a big damage which me make turn ugly and got really annoy by anything she did and whatever she say. It'z freaking irritating and it'z getting on my nervez, all over my damn body. So i just want to stop this and make it "THE END" for this year. Damn those thing that happened, damn those action we did, and damn those shit we said...SHUT UP coz it'z over.

But anyway the truth is i really don't how i suppose to do and say. Or rather she might also hate me in some way, so that'z why i do not know what should do. I also know that if anyone of us don't act fast enough to break the ice, our fellow bf will get kinda impatient about it eh.

ALRIGHT then. Nonesense shall stop, life still have to go on and there'z other better thingz to do rather than sulking everyday about the same shitty matter which had passed, right?? Haha, i think i better sms my dumbdumb now. Gonna sleep soon too=.=, there'z all then.

CHIAO-SUUUU~

taken quite awhile back. X3

to be continued...

Ah neh neh neh's day....~

Yippee ya-ya yipee yipee yaaaa~

Huuhuu, i'm having my lovely off day tommorow=D.

...Ouch by the way.

Damn it seriously, my fucking back/waist is fucking painful for christ sake. Damn fucking painful can...argh, seriously i'm pissed because my damn back coz i don't even how in the earth i can injured my stupid back and got worst in this bloody morning. Star star square square=.=...i was like macchiam a veg on the damn bed when i woke up. Trying my fucking best to sit up when i wanna scream out damn loud out coz is really painful. I really don't like this shit at all. Ended up i nearly screw all the people i served today, my work place new myanmar girl and also some jackass passerby. Damn damn damn damn damn irritated by it. I was like frowning for the whole goddamn day. It'z suck to meet this kind of shit when you gonna work. Ahhh~ fuck it, anyway i gonna see the damn doctor on thursday as my mum ask me to=/.

Ah yes, another problem...my ill-ed granny is in the house.

She'z ill, mentally ill...

And is not a joke at all. It'z kinda pretty sad actually=(. Coz she wasn't able taken well at malaysia as some moron, or you can even say some idiotz, over there don't even know how to take care of her when she'z now having this problem. Fook them all seriously, freaking bastard/bitches. I don't understand what the fuck they are thinking. Selfish animal. And they taught me and made me feel/think that daughter are way better than son. Oh ya, one more thing...being married to someone, both of them should able or try to love, filial and take good care of your partner'z parent coz they are the one who brought your husband/wife to this world so that he or she can bloody marry you, so what they are nasty/horrible to you. Freaking disgusted to core. Damn, shall say no more.

Oh well, so many nonesense popping out non-stop...hmm shall go and play dragon nest to distress abit. HAHAHA, alright then. CHIAO-SUUU~

------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm not their fan though, they're HOT here. LOLXD

to be continued...

Chop chop chop...

YESSSSS ARRRR~

Muahahaha, finally got to cut my damn messy dry hair today. WEEEE~ happy girl and happy hair XD.

Oh ya there'z another i had done today....MISSION 1ST ANNI IS ACCOMPLISHED~ WAHAHAHA~ you shall see stupid idiot dumb dumb a.k.a stupid hyper spoiler. Haha, seriously i really like what i'm gonna give him but i'm afraid that he might not really get surpise from it or whatever bad may happen=/ Oh well, i just hope he really like it=P. HAHAHA, i just don't know why i just wanna see him scream/get emotional/touched/shock or whatsoever stuff. HAHAHA~ getting all excited now.

I had quite nice day out with my sis and sidd bf=). Did some shopping, get my hair a good chopping and finding that stuff with my sis. My sis left us at around 7 plus, and we down to dhoby ghuat to play some L4D 2...it was bad coz we kept dying in one of stupid stage. The only word i can say is terrible. =.=...

Oh well, after that he send me off home and went to take the last bus back home. Stupid idiot, next time you do the same thing again, i not gonna talk to you and ignore you too, at all. Understand, stupid??

Haha, alright then. I think i shall head to bed soon, gonna work tomorrow. CHIAO-SU~

thank you, dear=3.

to be continued...

YEAAAAAAAHHH~!!!

Muahahahahaha~

Finally is saturday loh~ XD AHAHAHAHA, STUPID IDIOT DUMB DUMB IS COMING BACK SOOOOOON~ MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Hahaha, just too happy although this not the first time that we never met for two weekz. Happy happy happy~ weeee~

Ahhh, my mum neh...still having come back yet=.=. Thatz suckz man. Went to china a week, and now, went back to malaysia for like around 2 weekz ++. Gyabooo...=.= some more my dad will be joining her for a week too due to one of cousin is getting marry next month. Speechless anyway...=.= macchiam my mum is like doing some business trip to overseaz. Fly here and there...haiyo faster come back lah. Just feel weird that my mum wasn't around at home=.=. Too quiet...=(

Oh well, i think i shall head back to watch my Kaichou wa Maid-sama. Heehee, love this anime. Ok thatz all then. CHIAO-SUUU~^^

to be continued...

F-I-S-H~...

Yosh~

Blogging again loh. XD

Oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah~ i working at 4 tomorrow instead 12.30pm. Haha, happy me=D.

Oh ya, i remembered something delicious i had today for my break *slurp*. Haha, it'z some fried/bbq/grill fish coated and dipped in some yummy gravy and come together with curry rice and a slice of pan fried egg. Oh god, i can seriously tell you guyz that freaking food is freaking nice. Confirm plus chop. All thankz to my manager, LOL i meant in a good way ar, coz if he never asked me to help him to buy takeaway for him yesterday i don't i will even know that yummy-ilous thingy XD. If i not wrong the food stall is called what Riverside Indonesia Food whatsoever. Whatever it is, i freaking know where it is and i make sure to get my ass back there to eat it again. HAHAHA~ shall intro to my bf, i think he will love it X).

Ah it tuesday already loh...dear ar dear i'm missing you. I will make sure the first thing i saw you, i'm gonna tickle you like crazy, HAHAHA. Joking ar, but i can't guarantee that i won't do it. LOLXD.

Hahaha, i shall stop here then. Gonna continued playing Tetris Battle on FB, lol some recent addict =P. Ok then, CHIAO-SUUU~

I just love this couple in Skip Beat! XD

to be continued...

Energy boost~...

Gyabooooooooooo~

Yosh~ hihi bloggy and hihi to anyone who'z reading my blog. =)

Weeee~ power uppp!!! Haha, got back kinda lotz of energy back from my long hourz sleep=D. I slept like around 1030pm yesterday till this afternoon 1230pm, huuhuu shiok too the max. I was like in coma coz thru out the me sleep, i wasn't even interrupt by any noise or anything. Haha, like macchiam K.O. Weee~ i'm a happy girl~.

Today went to work as usual. Hmm, i think maybe because i got enough sleep thatz why today i didn't had any problem at work at all, haha. Actually not only that, coz today also got huiyi around too. Can talk quite alot stuff to her and also joke around with my work-mate. Haha, was kinda fun today=). Time passed fast than usual. Enjoyed working with huiyi, tun tun, zhen qiang and kian tao to L today, LOL.

Oh ya, when i talking with huiyi today, she mentioned about wordpress to me. Hmm, wordpress eh...kinda tempted to change my blog from blogger to wordpress. Lookz like more neater than blogger and more fun. But if i changed using wordpress, i definetely miss my blogger=(. Eeeyer sia, or maybe keep this blogger and just change using wordpress. Hmm, aiya i think i consider first then=/.

Haha, oh well shall stop here then. Gonna tried my luck at cabal today again. See whether sidd got online anot=/. CHIAO-SU~

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

to be continued...

Nil....

=(...

This is so not me, seriously. I thought i would alright that he'z not around for 2 weekz, like finding stuff to do when i having my off and kill me time on my sis'z lappy....but not even a week...I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!! DX

WHERE ARE YOU STUPID IDIOT DUMD DUMD!!! WHY YOU NEVER MAKE ANY RESPONSE TO MY SMS THAT SENT IT TO YOU!!!!???? AND I'M FREAKING WORRIED WHEN YOU DIDN'T MAKE ANY REPLY COZ YOU SAID YOUR MUM'Z TOWN AREA IS FLOODING!!!! X( Stupid you, please sms me, find me at channel 10 at cabal at night or anything when you see this blog post, can??=( I feel like crying out really loud...stupid you X(.

Gonna hold a grip of myself. He'z definitely fine, very very fine. Everything is okay...

Alright, gonna sleep soon coz tomorrow gonna follow my mum to JB as she gonna do something over, and plus i have to go down to the damn fucking school settle the fee thingy as they called to my house said that if i didn't pay the feez by tomorrow, they gonna send me a court order. Oh well, whatever. =.=

Thatz all then, OYASUMI!!!

to be continued...

weird emtpy feeling...

Woosh...~

Stupid went back to Thailand for 2 weekz. Ahhh...it'z nothing special though but feel kinda not use to it=/. He'z having good slacking time over there and i'm busy working over here, argh jealous can LOL. Hope he can enjoy and relax over there well=).

Hmm, i think there'z nothing for me to blog for now. Gonna sleep now and my damn period is here torturing me=.=. Alright then, OYASUMI~!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nah, delicated for you since i didn't blog and delicate to my mum when she went to china. LOL!!! Ok lah, i miss you idiot =P.

to be continued...